Ebere and Kiemute had been married for eight years, fervently praying to be blessed with the fruits of the womb, when the opportunity to adopt a child opened up around them. They lived in a predominantly white community and preferred to adopt a child whose looks would not be radically different from theirs. Ebere taught at a community college where she met Belinda, a young girl of African descent who was carrying an unwanted pregnancy, courtesy of her ex-boyfriend, a black South African. Ebere and Kiemute quickly commenced the adoption process to enable them access to the child after delivery. They monitored the pregnancy closely and ensured Belinda was well cared for. However, to their astonishment, Belinda gave birth to a Caucasian brunette baby girl. How could this happen? DNA testing showed the black South African to be the father. After much debate and prayers, Ebere and Kiemute agreed to proceed with the adoption but not until they had received some answers to the puzzle. It was confirmed medically possible.

Ebere and Kiemute lavished love and affection on their daughter who they named Hazel (the colour of her eyes) and to their pleasant surprise, Ebere conceived two years later and birthed a baby brother – Brian. Brian was visibly black and as the family moved around the city, there would be stares and whispers by people who were trying to fathom the family relationship. Hazel is now four years old and Brian two and Ebere realises that there may be a need to explain their circumstances to the children and she wonders…at what stage? If only Hazel was black, she would probably not need to inform her that she is adopted.

Foluke, an accomplished professional in her field of endeavour, married a widower, (Bobade) with three children. Unfortunately, the accident which had claimed the life of the first wife of her husband had rendered him impotent. She however desired a child of her own and they both agreed to use a sperm bank. The IVF was successful but Foluke and her husband were surprised when she gave birth to a son with multiracial features. Their findings later indicated that the donor was from a mixed heritage which had resulted in the unusually light skin and pointed nose of their son. Needless to say, tongues wagged as to the likelihood of infidelity on the part of Foluke although, Bobade was quick to ignore the comments. Nevertheless, Foluke wondered what explanations to give her son and his siblings as they grow older and relate to the outside world.

Undoubtedly with various multiracial marriages and technological advances in child procreation, we expect to see a lot more “splashes of colour within families.” The implication is that the mindsets of uniformity within the family will have to change and people will learn to expect and accommodate multiracialism without question.

Back to Ebere’s case. What would you advise in her circumstance, especially given the beautiful, splash of colour in their midst? Hers will certainly need some explanation to prepare the children for some of the embarrassment they would be faced with in school or other public fora.

Love

Havilah